Kel's Graduation

我回来了!

I'm back!

When was the last time i blog on this journal?

It seems extremely long!

Mid year now~ Unbelievable man! How fast it has come!

Hope everyone that i knew is doing fine...

It's really hard to catch up sometimes as we all are busy with our own schedules..

Had two frens who are overseas now.. One in italy, another in bkk.

My turn my turn!!! Yes, taiwan in less than 3weeks more! Woohoo!

Coming to weekend, you really wan2 laze around @home.. or having an afternoon tea session..

Kinda like a Tai-Tai life.. Okie, i'm aiming towards that.. haha..

I think it would be nice to just sit on a couch.. reading books.. watching tv.. enjoy the simple life..

Being at home during this weekend.. somehow i feel time is slow.. really slow.. and i can do much more things.. online blogging.. chatting w frens.. playing games.. read a book.. watch tv programs.. and soon nightfalls..

It's kinda relaxing.. Quiet..

Been thinking alot lately for the things that had happened in the past two months.. And finally.. i can say that i am ME! Thanks for someone who had 点醒我... I believe time will solve everything..

Attended my cousin's church wedding ydae.. it was my first time witnessing a church wedding ceremony..

I was touched.. When both the bride and the groom thanks their parents.. Tears rolled down my cheeks.. Not just me.. but mi cousins too.. To me, wedding is a very touching thing.. It's the moment when a couple begins a new stage of life and moving out from their parents. All these years of bringing up a child and now she moves out and lives with her husband.. someone to take care of for the rest of their lives.. Parents will really she bu de ba.. So it always tearing for me to see such a scene and when they both say thank you to their parents..

I wonder when it's my turn.. i think i will cry too.. And my relatives and cousins were all saying that next one my turn.. hahaha.. Still have a long time to go.. Not even in the courtship yet..-_-''' But i always picture this.. that if someone is to woo me, is kinda easy.. maybe sing me a love song and playing guitar at the beach.. The very classic and simple ones like those in the drama.. hahaha.. I'm easily touched la.. So perhaps i would say yes.. But the person must be someone i can click with la.. If it's those nuisance and irritating kind.. Then sure reject.. I'm not someone who will 钓起来卖... Love doesn't comes easily ar.. especially for the right person..

You know for the longest time of my birthday wish still remains the same.. Awaitin for the right person to come. And time and again i wished for the same thing.. nothing happens.. This year.. i'm not gonna do the same anymore.. maybe this will break the curse.. hahaha..

I rather wish that i'll be happy everyday.. Not hoping for anything.. Okie, maybe a bonus or pay increment or promotion.. hahaha.. or maybe i will win a big lottery ticket or an overseas trip to somewhere.. hahaha i'm crapping..

This year birthday.. i want to sit on the singapore flyer.. It's somethin i wan2 try for a long time ever since it opens..
Other than that, this year i don't wish for any other things ar.. a simple dinner with my close frens ba..

i wish for someone to make me laugh

someone to crack jokes and make me laugh...

sounds funny.. but this is how i feel now..

so filled with tears walking back home..

i dunno y.. just suddenly.. i feel so lonely..

i dun mind being alone.. just the feelin that ppl are goin out having fun..

i'm stuck at home and do nothing at all..

wat a lousy feeling..

... sian ... work is gonna come on mon again..

life is so meaningless somehow.. just lookin forward to havin more money in my wallet and have a chance to travel real soon.. full-stop.. i also dunno wat else to aim for life..

:(

三吋日光

深秋山顶风微凉
恋人并肩傻傻看夕阳
阳光 你为我敞开的天窗
一段日光落在手心三吋长
你说 秋天掌上的日光
一吋能许一个愿望
希望我爱的人健康
个性很善良
大大手掌能包容我小小的倔强
你的浪漫只有我懂 欣赏
能让眼泪长出翅膀
飞离我脸庞
还想每天用咖啡香不让你赖床
周末傍晚踩着单车逛黄昏市场
我的浪漫只有你懂欣赏
就让每个台风晚上 不恐慌紧张
第三个愿望 还不想讲
你自己想一想
问微笑的月光

Kel's plan 08

Come to think of it.. i dun even noe whether i can hit two countries this yr.. but so be it if i can't.. doesn't matter much.. it's not really envying ppl who get to travel.. but is just tellin miself when can i get a break too.. when do i deserve to go for a long break.. i had been waitin for this chance for one yr plus.. i haven had any off day since 07.. the last trip to bangkok is like so long ago.. Come one day i shall backpack europe.. my desire place is somewhere cold.. where i can enjoy the cooling weather.. just like in perth..

Yearn to get out of here and take a break.. come back with a fresher mind to focus on mi work.. work is gonna be crazy.. it's not easy and started to feel that i need to handle alot of things.. from the small issue to the major ones.. it's a good learning space for me.. as a marketing position.. and i'm glad i found this job.. towards where i'm heading.. i can see that i'm still okie with my work.. at least for the first time i'm doing a REAL marketing job!

Soon it's the 3rd month of 08.. unbelievable fast.. for now one thing i wished is to enjoy life alittle more and focus on my career.. with no commitment on hand..

Was talkin to sush tonite @ our usual hangout cafe.. actually beauty lies on the eye of the beholder.. time will tell.. just dun think too much about it.. This is wat i learnt from beng.. alot of things beyond our control.. if it's urs.. meant to be..

Begin to think of plans for myself this year.. what i want to achieve.. besides work.. i tot about havin a car license, and my piano lesson.. Soon, i'll take up my piano lesson first.. Don't need to wait for someone to play for me.. I can do it myself.. Pu gong yin de yue ding.. hehe.. mayb next month.. i can try christofori music sch..

Get myself a car license.. den i can go whenever i like.. can rent a car or somethin.. but ppl might have to avoid me on the road haha..

On the bus home from Suntec, i was thinking of some stuff.. Something that had been on my mind for the whole of this week. And to end it, i simply tell myself not to repeat history. Sometimes, it takes two hands to clap. That is - it wun happen for my case. I know perfectly well. So i better stop thinking.. It's just getting worse..

My life is simple.. so simple that sometimes it's really boring.. and i really do wanna make my life interesting.. had been thinking of places to go and eat.. things to do.. but yet i can't find someone to share with.. Just like going to the Mickey Mouse Restaurant.. or to the Ben & Jerry @ Dempsey.. or to go eat durian.. Alot of things that i want to do yet i can't fulfill it.. All i can do is to wait.. Just like the whole of this week, apart from Mon nite with Nicole and Zihao, Tues goin to the SIM Lib, the rest at home and tonite dinner with sush... Basically this week is totally bored.. Tml goin to my cousin's house to run together, my first exercise after CNY! Yes, i know i'm getting fatter.. can feel the heaviness in me.. hahaha Den sun, havin badminton w mi sec sch frens and sendin Nicole off @ airport in the evening..

That's it for the week.. Oh ya.. tml gonna go Marriott Hotel for site inspection first and to Vivocity.. So tired.. gonna even work durin weekends.. I know the road ahead is getting busier.. But for now, if i can afford to go off on the dot.. i'll... Who noes how things will go in a few months time..

Aniwaez.. i feel that i'm getting more and more silly.. and my action is more and more obvious.. shit shit shit.. how how how.. sometimes i really dunno y i can't control.. haa dunno wat i'm talkin about rite.. good.. hahaha.. I know Beng will say don't think about it.. But i really guess it's just me that feels the way because of my own thinking.. But aniwae.. doesn't matter now.. everything comes to a stop.. I just don't wan things to turn out worse.. Rather remain at its status quo.

Was telling sush that i dun like r/ship in office.. It's just not nice.. Not that i'm saying someone likes me in the office.. But given if somethin happen.. i really will just reject.. coz i basically dun like it.. Haha.. This new colleague, from the sales team, came on board on Tues and he was like giving me this stare everytime i walk into the room.. Just like a pair of eyes watching you.. Just so weird la.. And sush said does he do that to every ger.. Ok, i must see whether he does that to Christal.. my pretty colleague.. she is the chio one.. So guys will sure fall for her, plus she is very good at talking.. sweet talking.. Another colleague who got this sweet smile, her name is Serene.. attached to her boss.. haha.. so weird la.. Is like a boss and assistant r/ship..

All my office ppl are very friendly.. very nice ppl.. thou many are malaysians.. but they just make u feel so welcome.. Just that we're so drawn across the line that they are from which team and we are from which team.. funny..

Like what my dad says.. nobody knows what tomorrow lies ahead.. So live life simple and be contented with what you have.. My dad always scold me from envying people all the time.. I'm not born with a silver spoon.. But being very sheltered by my family, my aunt and my grandma..

Lately had been thinking abt my grandma.. den i start to tear.. coz i really missed her so so much! When i've blue-black on my leg or hand.. i will ask her to rub for me.. Always whine infront of her.. She will give me money to buy jeans when i'm very poor.. She dotes me alot.. just like a mother.. She'll give me massage when i complain my back pain.. She's good at it.. I really miss her so so much! Really want to show her my bf when i have one.. But i really nv expect her to leave me so fast.. She's even praying for me that i'll find one soon.. Whenever i go, she'll be there in my heart.. Everytime when i was down.. the moment i starts to think of her.. although i'll cry but i'll know that she's watching me.. Just up there in the sky.. Always there to watch for me.. Coz i know she dotes me alot.. and she taught me so many things.. Man.. i'm tearing.. Haha i better end here..

Before i go, just wanna ans sush this bit.. I wun kick you aside when i've a bf.. doesn't matter who my bf turns out to be.. It applies to all my frens as well.. Just like Beng said if i've a bf.. den no time to meet her.. My rule is.. life needs to be balance.. there is work, family, frens and of coz ur love one.. so ya lo..

Tat's all folks..

Nitez~

渴望有的已经没了感觉

人世间最残酷的是分离

只会让每个人悲伤痛苦

Is like part of the life lesson that we learned

Thou i nv been into a relationship.. there are alot of things that i'm not sure of.. the feelings.. the thoughts.. the tears.. the heart..

It just give me a thought that if one day it happens to me.. will i be just like them..

I'm scared to love someone now.. dunno how to love someone.. dunno how the feeling comes about..

Could be this particular one day, i'll meet that him.. my partner for the rest of my life.. maybe not..

Yuan Fen.. hard to tell.. when it will come..

To me, i no longer have any criteria of a bf.. even when dan ask me.. i can't answer.. perhaps i dun long for it anymore.. it just disappear tat kinda of feeling.. very sad rite..

Doesn't really matter.. to me now, work is more important..

And being freedom..

Yup..

Sign off
Kel